To those of us who have children in our lives, whether they are our own, grandchildren, nieces, nephews, or students… here is something to make you chuckle.
Whenever your children are out of control, you can take comfort from the thought that even God’s omnipotence did not extend to His own children. After creating heaven and earth, God created Adam and Eve. And the first thing he said was ‘ DON’T !’
Advice For The Day:
Be nice to your kids. They will choose your nursing home one day.
- You spend the first two years of their life teaching them to walk and talk. Then you spend the next sixteen telling them to sit down and shut up.
- Grandchildren are God’s reward for not killing your own children.
- Mothers of teens now know why some animals eat their young.
- Children seldom misquote you. In fact, they usually repeat word for word what you shouldn’t have said .
- The main purpose of holding children’s parties is to remind yourself that there are children more awful than your own .
- We childproofed our homes, but they are still getting in.
AND FINALLY: IF YOU HAVE A LOT OF TENSION AND YOU GET A HEADACHE, DO WHAT IT SAYS ON THE ASPIRIN BOTTLE: ‘TAKE TWO ASPIRIN’ AND ‘KEEP AWAY FROM CHILDREN’!!!!! Thanks to my mom for sending this to me!
As a Visual Digital Marketing Specialist for New Horizons 123, Julie works to grow small businesses, increasing their online visibility by leveraging the latest in internet and video technologies. She specializes in creative camera-less animated video production, custom images, content writing, and SlideShare presentations. Julie also manages content, blog management, email marketing, marketing automation, and social media for her clients.
Very funny post! My children are grown and there are no grandchildren yet but this still brings back memories. Oh the teen years. I’ll never forget the refrigerator magnet that I proudly displayed. It read: “Teenagers Leave Home Now While You Still Know Everything.” 🙂
Hi Sherryl, Do you still have that magnet? I still have “one” and would like to use it LOL. We all need to laugh right? Glad you enjoyed it 🙂
I hear you Rick, Ditto about the grandchildren front – most definitely NOT ready for that! My trying times are not over yet I still wouldn’t trade being a parent for ANYTHING in the world. Funny, when I meet someone I haven’t seen in 30+ years and they look really young, some how I just know that they didn’t have any children 🙂
Julie
Thanks for the smiles!!!! Love the post! I raised three teenage girls on my own!!! Thank goodness my mother lived near by. Now I have 10 wonderful grandchildren and as my grandmother reminded my mother I remind my daughters “They are pay back for how you acted when you were a child!”
Have a Great Day
Chester
Oh Julie, that was too funny. I normally roll up to your blog to get some video-know how wisdom but this was a great laughter break!
Reminds me of all the reasons I chose to have dogs and not kids – much easier to train!
… Mind you, I always fancied the idea of grandkids. Does ‘God’ have any pearls of wisdom on how to make that happen please?!
Love your sense of humour. Definitely coming back for more next week 🙂
Julie this is SUCH a great post, I’m actually going to send a link to my sister! Seriously, not only clever, but what an amazing baby photo. Thank you so much for sharing this!
@Chester: 3 TEENAGE girls? Yikes! You know what they say about “payback” 🙂
@Mandy: glad you liked the post. I can’t help you out with grandchildren but I would be more than happy to loan you one of my children LOL
@Marquita: I couldn’t resist sharing this post. My mom sent it to me and I don’t always have the time to read the stuff she sends me so this one she MADE ME SIT DOWN and read it LOL Glad I did.
Hey Julie,
That was hilarious… I love the ” I child proofed the home, but they are still getting in”! lol
Kids can give you a run for your money, but it’s so worth it…. keeps life interesting.
Thanks for making me laugh!
Talk soon,
Kevin
HI Kevin, Ya think? When my now 18 year old was very little, my head was spinning from hearing ‘MOMMY, MOMMY, MOMMY, MOMMY… OVER AND OVER AND OVER AGAIN. I remember clearly looking at her and simply saying, “i am changing my name from “mommy””. She looked at me and said “to what”? I said ” I can’t tell you because then you will use it”. She looked confused. Must have been about 3 years old. Now? I would love to hear that same word over and over and over again but of course 18 year olds don’t need their “mommy” right? 🙂
Julie,
This post is hilarious!! My children are in the walking and talking stage, mind you they are starting to repeat. I particularly got a good laugh out of the remark about teenagers reminding you of why some animals eat their young. Still laughing my sister has a teen boy who has just made quite a switch. I’ll have to pass this on to her too! Thanks for the laugh 🙂
Hi Lynda, your children are little? Hang on tight – it is going to be a wild ride! 🙂 But don’t forget to cherish every moment – they go by way too quickly!
Hahaha… This is awesome! I shared it on my facebook to spread the laugh.. As a mother, my child is my inspiration and my strength to continue and fight to survive. I really want to give her everything but sometimes I can’t. She makes me laugh when she talks about everything happens her whole day and cry when I scolded her. Thanks for your blog.. I loved it..
@Ness: Glad you spread the laughter 🙂 How old is your daughter? You want to give her everything? I am guessing she isn’t at the age yet where she is demanding everything 🙂
@Leslie: Congrats on the impending birth of your grandchild 🙂
Very inspiring article! The baby looks so peaceful and cute while sleeping. And base on my observation, it is very hard to raise a child but they are the ones that make us happy. 🙂
They do look peaceful don’t they? That changes BIG TIME when they hit the teenage monster years LOL. Yes, they are difficult to raise but THE most rewarding experience one can ever be fortunate enough to experience! 🙂
Hello,
This was really funny, hehe. Having children is the best experience and adventure of your life. Having children gives life a direction, we always run for money for our children, try to give our children the best, try to offer our children a bright future; we practically are optimistic for our children, we smile for them. Thanks for sharing!
George
Very funny, you make me laugh at this! It is not easy to become a parent to your children BUT you enjoy right? As a father of my little kids, I’m tired of reminding them not to do this, not to do that, BUT there is a big BUT, I’m happy for being a father because my kids are very naughty and they keep on riding at my back and they sweet.
HI William. If I made you laugh, then I accomplished my goal 🙂 You can say that again – it is NOT easy but something I wouldn’t trade for anything in the world! Don’t blink because if you do, your “little” kids will be all grown up like mine are. Enjoy every minute!
Hi Mark. Yes this is true. Parenting is the most difficult job ANYWHERE and doesn’t come with a manual! 🙂 Glad you enjoyed it!
So the punishment was to give them children? lol. Funny story indeed and it has a lesson at the end.
Looking forward for more stories. 🙂
Val Adams of contemporary jewelry